It's bad enough that there is a three hour time difference between the East and West Coasts but here's the really confusing thing.  The water's on the wrong side.

When you spend your entire life making directional choices based on whether you are heading towards or away from the water and the water changes sides, it is a problem.  (You know people from South Carolina don't use maps, you saw the Miss South Carolina beauty pagent contestant, didn't you? )

In one of my first trips out here, I was thoroughly convinced that the signs were wrong based on my internal awareness that oceans are always on the East of any starting point.  It was thoroughly mind boggling when I tried to get this through the head of the person on 411 who was trying to help me get from point A to point B.  She just couldn't grasp the problem at all. 

When I finally somehow managed to reach my destination, a very amused co-worker reminded me that I was on the West Coast now and that the Ocean had in fact gotten up and moved to the other side of the bed.  And the darn thing had apparently decided to change its name from  "Atlantic" to "Pacific". 

I knew I should of brought me some of that moonshine Mommer and 'em keep down in the basement. 

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